Tired ramble about school.

2003-05-13 - 8:14 a.m.

Speaking of rest, I got very little. We had a staff meeting yesterday, during the day, which is when I sleep, which meant that instead of sleeping, I sat here at work. The meeting finished, and I stayed here at work. My work shift began, and so I was here at work. My work shift is over and I'm too tired to pack up my things, so maybe I'll just stay here at work.

Anyway, as a part of my fatigue-induced fugue, I read an email from my mom where she commented that I'll be glad about taking my editing class because of the mental stimulation, and she's right.

After last week's class, I came home and just talked to Pookie. I suddenly had a million things I wanted to tell him, and the weird thing was that most of them weren't even about school. I think that three hours a week of socialising outside of my usual haunts, of challenging myself and participating in a larger world than I'm used to are also making me become more engaged in the world that I already had. I like that.

Part of it, too, is probably because summer is coming, and that's my season.

And I have rediscovered colour. Hooray for spring!

Of course, all of this goodness means that I'll have an opposite sort of entry soon, probably focusing on the fact that even 4 weeks into the class, I still have to deal with anxiety before I go. I have a serious case of the "I'm a fraud and this is the class where everyone will know it"-itis. Also the "This is the day where they'll pick groups and I'll be left by myself. Because they all hate me." Sigh.

Honestly, it's like I'm two different people in the hours before class and the hours after class. I'm not sure who I am -during- class because that isn't me.

Cheers,

The Magus

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