Stuff

2003-01-22 - 5:06 a.m.

I think I have a good idea for a novel.

Having someone in the house who is job hunting is having an effect on me as well. He's out there every day trying to improve his life in some way, whereas I'm feeling like I'm in a holding pattern. I want to be in school, and I'm feeling really disappointed that that hasn't worked out this month. April (when the next class I want to take is being offered) seems so far away. I almost want to go looking for another job, except that with my education I don't think that I'd be able to find one that's better than where I'm at.

So, all that nervous energy has to be used somewhere. I've signed up for something similar to the National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo), called the National Novel Writing Year, which is basically the same thing, except it's several novels spread out through the year. I have until the end of March to write 100 thousand words. Since I started today, I'm feeling sort of optimistic.

I've also renewed my commitment to being a vegetarian, something I never officially renounced, but that had started to mean I was "cheating" twice a week or so. I'm a week in and am feeling good about it. I was a relatively strict vegetarian for a few years before I met Pookie, so we'll see how that goes.

And, lastly, I'm thinking again about my drinking habits. I've been experiencing memory loss from the nights when I drink, and that is a fairly new development, and is somewhat alarming. An example is that I had no idea I wrote those last two entries, or that I sent out a batch of banners. I guess last night, when I went to bed, I reminded Pookie of his abusive, alcholic father in the way that I passed out, snored loudly, and was (apparently) really vicious to him when he tried to get me to share some of the bed. Pookie's dad is the last person I want to remind someone of.

I think it's maybe time for me to stop drinking, and to make it stick. At least for the winter, at least for the next six months. We need to money, I need the piece of mind that comes without worrying if you did anything embarassing that you can't remember, it would undoubtedly be better for my health.

I hope this is a short winter.

Cheers,

The Magus

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