Books

2002-08-15 - 1:14 a.m.

I have added Dostoevsky to my list of favourite authors, even though I haven't yet finished his book, and I think I already know "whodunnit."

There's a reason for this.

When I read, I adore books that make me feel bigger than I am, that make me a part of something larger and wonderful or terrible. A Tale of Two Cities brought me to tears. So did The World According to Garp. So did The Last Battle in the Narnia series (and, come to think of it, so did Voyage of the Dawn Treader). The Stand did it when Nick died, and I think It did, too. I'm reading Lord of the Rings for about the billionth time and even now I can feel myself welling with tears for Frodo and Sam's commitment to each other, commitment to something larger than themselves.

Crying isn't a prerequisite for books, though it's much more difficult to get me to cry when I'm reading as compared to watching television or a movie, or, say, punching me repeatedly in the face. I didn't cry reading The Magus, but I could not stop turning pages, either. Madeleine L'Engle's stuff is amazing, but I don't think I shed a tear for Meg in A Wrinkle in Time (or maybe I did, sentimental fool I am). E.M. Forster (whose name I will never spell right, I'm sure) has brought me close, I think, but never quite...but I drool when I read him.

These books are amazing because they create a world, or let me see this one better...they show me the largeness and grandness in even the tiniest or dispicable aspects of the world.

I want to write like these people, because I want someone else to experience a larger world through my words. I want there to be a new vastness in someone's experience, for them to feel that same swelling, that same shame or wonder that I feel when I'm reading a great book. Who are we as a people? Why do we do such great and terrible things? Who are we, to create and destroy with such carelessness? Why does love make it all better? Why are some things never going to be healed?

Fiction is great for answering these questions...and at its best, its great at just asking them.

Cheers,

The Magus

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